Misunderstood
by DSISandraPullman39
Summary: Gerry see's something he shouldn't can Sandra convince him he's completely misunderstood things?
1. Chapter 1

**Misunderstood** 1/?

**Disclaimer:-** Don't own them just borrowing!

**Episode:- **The Braves

**Pairing:- **Sandra/Gerry

**Rating:-** M

**Achieve:- . /group/new_tricksff/**

**Summary:-** Gerry see's something he shouldn't can Sandra convince him he's completely misunderstood things?

**Author's Note:- **Based around the whole Stewart Barlow thing in "the Braves" Not sure how long it's going to be yet might be a couple of chapters might be loads we'll see !

"Stewart what are you doing here?" Sandra asked opening the door and finding the other detective on her doorstep.

"You never did let me take you for that drink so I thought I'd bring the booze to you and maybe you can help me drown my sorrows." He replied as she sighed heavily standing aside to let him in as he went to the living room setting the bag on the table as she went to the kitchen for a glass and some ice.

This was the last thing she needed, the braves case had been a nightmare from beginning to end and right now in spite of their history the last thing she wanted was to spend the night listening to him tell her how much of a mistake she was making staying at U.C.O.S. She still couldn't believe that she'd let him get to her the way she had, how he'd made her have doubts, however briefly, about what she did and now he was here again.

"How did it go with you D.A.C?" She asked returning and handing him the ice bucket and glass shaking her head as he held out the of vodka out to her preferring to stick to the untouched glass of wine she'd poured herself before he arrived.

"How do you think?" He replied pouring a drink that was more vodka than tonic before continuing. "Let's just say if I said you were on the naughty step I'm heading for reform school. He doesn't believe that I didn't have any idea what was going on he thinks I was letting the fact I wanted to get York cloud my judgement."

"And were you? I mean I'm not saying you knew what Jason Knowles had done but maybe you missed the signs because you felt you were getting somewhere." Sandra sighed feeling her heart ache a little as he shrugged staring into his glass. She knew how easy it was to become single minded when you'd been working the same case for so long and were so absorbed in it.

"I deserved that. I'm sorry about what I said to you the other day I was…well I don't know what I was but complete tosser would just about cover it. What you guys do in U.C.O.S is great and I know it's important I can see now why you stay. You are one of the best I've ever come across that bit was right but I can see now why it's so important for someone as good as you to be heading it up. You all managed to blow me out of the water and onto the ever growing pile of others you've proved you and the three geriatric's are better than."

"Stewart that's now what we're about and if you think it is I was wrong about it when I said you hadn't changed. You said we spend our time cleaning up messes created by others but that's not what we're about." Sandra snapped anger really rising in her chest as he rolled his eyes. "We give closure to families and make sure people who thought they'd got away with it are brought to justice and as for my team you may think they are over the hill but they can investigate 90% of serving officers into the ground and do on a daily basis."

"Oh god I should have known, well it can't be Jack and it'll hardly be Memory Lane so…..ah you and Standing? I heard he had a reputation with female officers but I thought you had more sense you and ….."

"Jesus what is it with me?" Sandra sighed now believing what she was hearing. "I had this exact conversation with Gerry not two days ago because he thought I'd agreed to step back on the Chapman case because you and I had been shagging when we were at Hendon. Gerry and I respect each other something you clearly couldn't understand not everything is about sex."

"So you didn't tell him then?" Stewart asked pouring himself another drink and smiling at her. "When he asked if we're had a relationship back then you didn't tell him?"

"We didn't have a relationship Stewart there wasn't anything to tell." Sandra replied abandoning her half empty drink and sighing heavily.

"Yeah right we….."

"We had a drunken one night stand the evening we graduated then we went our separate ways and I didn't lay eyes on you again until I walked into my office and you were standing there 2 days ago. That's not a relationship Stewart sleeping together once doesn't make us loves young dream."

"it was more than once as I recall, it may have been only one night and we may have been drunk when it started but I for one was stone cold sober when you left my place that morning and I hadn't spent much time sleeping. So I think the fact that I've done things to you and with you that Standing could only dream of doing means there would be something to tell." Stewart smiled the edge to his gaze as he let his eyes run the length of her body making the anger she was feeling peak.

"Look it was a long time ago and it sure as hell wasn't the reason I was prepared to give the Chapman case up. To be honest I don't even know why you came here you said it yourself when you decided to have a go at my career choices we lost touch we've both changed. I think may you should go before we both say something we'll regret."

Standing up Sandra stared at him as he got up closing in on her his hands reaching for her arms gently running up and down them.

"You know you're still a stunning woman Sandra if anything you've only got better with age. I can still remember how it felt that night, how good we were together, how about we relive it for old time's sake." He said quietly his lips colliding violently with hers as she froze for a second before pushing him away in shock glancing out the window as she heard tires screech and familiar headlights pull out of her driveway.

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Pulling into Sandra's driveway Gerry killed the engine and reached for the take away bag on the passenger seat and went to get out of the car when his attention was caught but movement in the sitting room window. Pausing he watched as Stewart Barlow stood so close to her that their bodies were almost touching, his fingers running over her arms as he kissed her hungrily.

Feeling his chest tighten he turned the ignition key throwing the car into gear and screeching away. She'd told him there was nothing going on between them, as good as laughed at him for asking and now he'd seen it with his own eyes. Well if that was how she wanted to play it Barlow was welcome to her.

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"Stewart that as seriously out of line." Sandra snapped her pulse racing as she saw familiar car pull out of the driveway and wanted to scream. "You don't just get to walk in here and expect to have a quick shag for old time's sake, it's not going to happen now get out of my house."

Watching as he gathered up his jacket and left without saying another word she reach for her phone dialling Gerry's number with trembling hands. Why the hell did he have to turn up at that exact moment and why did this have to happen now of all times. She knew now he'd be convinced she'd lied to him and while she had she knew what he was imagining now was a thousand times worse than the truth.

"Gerry it's me…..I know you were here…it's not what you think…Jesus why can't you just answer your bloody phone for once." She sighed when the answer phone kicked in and she grabbed her car keys from the hall table and left the house. "I'm coming over….I'll be there in ten minutes and remember…well just remember I love you ok?"


	2. Chapter 2

****For author's notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Misunderstood** 2/?

Pulling up outside Gerry's house Sandra sighed, his car wasn't back yet and the house was in darkness. Killing the engine she stared at the empty driveway trying to think where he might be before realising that wherever he was it wouldn't be the right place to have the conversation they needed to. She still couldn't believe what was happening, she couldn't believe that Stewart Barlow thought had the right to walk back into her life after twenty years and turn it upside down. The night they'd spent together while not a mistake was certainly nothing important to her. To arrive at her door stinking o booze and feeling sorry for himself and expect to pick up where they left off was laughable as far as she was concerned. She loved Gerry and she know he loved her but their relationship was new and still easily broken as they built the trust that was needed for it to last like they both wanted it to.

"What are you doing here shouldn't you be busy making up for lost time with Barlow?" The familiar voice through the car window startled her as she realised she'd been so lost in her own contemplations that she hadn't seen him arrive back.

"Gerry it's not what you think we need to talk about this," She replied as he walked away unlocking the front door then leaving it open for her to follow him inside. "At least let me explain I know what you saw and I know what you're thinking but there's nothing going on between me and Stewart Barlow."

"Yeah well that's not what it looks like from where I'm standing." Gerry snapped back the stabbing pain in his chest caused when he'd seen the other man kiss her still out weighing his desire to have her tell him it was nothing and she still loved him. "You've been acting like someone I don't even know since Barlow appeared on the scene I know what I saw and I know what it means well fine if that's what you want then he's welcome to you."

"You complete bastard Gerry is that really how little you think of me? That all it would take is someone to turn up that I haven't laid eyes on in twenty years and I'd forget how much I loved you and throw this all away?"

"Jack told us what he said to you and how you've been thinking during this case it's perfectly clear you think you're too good for us these days, too much the hot shot ace detective to hang around with three old codgers doing the jobs no one else wants to." Gerry continued as she mentally damned Jack for not being able to keep his mouth shut and promised herself that when she saw him again he'd regret it. "It's obvious that you're planning on leaving the unit and now it's just as clear that it means leaving me behind too."

"Gerry I wasn't planning on leaving UCOS I was frustrated by the fact that we constantly get stonewalled. People like Barlow think they can come in and drag us off a case because what they do is so much more important. Forgive me for sometimes thinking it would be easier to be the tosser throwing my weight around rather than constantly being on the receiving end. Not only that but if I did decide to move on it wouldn't mean I didn't love you or was leaving you behind too." Sandra replied her voice raising more than she intended but finding it impossible to stay as calm as she'd promised herself she would while he was suggesting that she would suddenly fall out of love with him just because they no longer worked together.

"You lied to me Sandra I asked you straight out if you and Barlow had a history and you said no, you can't seriously expect me to believe that's true after what I saw tonight? You don't trust me to be able to understand if you did you would have told me what he'd said to you not Jack, I knew something was wrong with you but did you come to me and let me reassure you? Like hell you did!"

"I didn't speak to you about it because you always react like this and ok I did lie to you about me and Stewart but that was because it wasn't a relationship it was a drunken shag, a one off and tonight he turned up pissed and feeling sorry for himself and tried it on "for old time's sake" he said but…."

"So you just decided to go along with it I mean why now clearly he does more for you than I do and you thought what the hell?" Gerry shouted back the combination of betrayal at how she'd lied to him and what he'd seen and fear that he was about to lose her eating him alive. "I'm not sure that I know you any more actually I'm not sure that I ever did. Maybe I was just handy, convenient until someone better came along well I hope you'll both be very happy together I…."

"You know what Gerry if that's really what you think of me clearly it's me who has never known you, I'm leaving now, you know where I'll be if you decide to stop acting like a complete tosser though even then I'm not sure I want to see you again." Sandra interrupted her voice suddenly frighteningly calm as she turned her back on him willing the tears she could feel stinging the back of her eye not to escape until she was safely in the car and on her way home as far away from him as possible.


	3. Chapter 3

****For Authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Misunderstood** 3/?

Knocking on the door of Jack's home Gerry sighed angrily, she was refusing to answer her phone and when he went back to her place she refused to answer the door too he knew she was there, her car was in the driveway but clearly she didn't want to speak to him. She'd left his house for less than two minutes before he realised immediately that he'd been a tosser and he'd wanted to make it right straight away but clearly she wasn't planning on making it that easy for him. When he left her place he'd driven around trying repeatedly to get her to pick up the phone until eventually he gave up and found himself outside Jack's house. None of them knew her as well as Jack and right now it was more important that he get some advice on how to fix things than it was to avoid any embarrassment he might feel while telling his friend what had happened.

"Gerry what are you doing here I thought you were going to Sandra's with a takeaway to cheer her up when you left the pub." Jack said opening the door then standing aside to let him in.

"Yeah well I completely screwed up it's a long story but I need your advice." Gerry replied as they made it into the kitchen and Jack poured them both a drink as they sat at the table.

"What have you done and where does it come on the "pissed off Sandra" scale?" Jack sighed his concern growing as Gerry stared into his glass and took a deep breath before talking.

"Well you remember the time I got Catlin to score drugs when we were working on the ice cream bandit case and she barely spoke to me for a week?" He began pausing as Jack nodded "Well compared to this that was not even on the scale I've seriously fucked up and I don't know how to fix it."

"Jesus Gerry it's not another woman is it? If it is you can shove you advice I'll be sticking my toe up your ass as I kick you out the door."

"No of course it's not, you remember I told you I asked her if her and Barlow had a history and she said no?"

"Yeah well I didn't think they did only you immediately think if people are civil to someone from their past it's because they had a sexual relationship." Jack replied starting to get concerned about where this was going. He'd always known Sandra and Gerry would end up together eventually, and he'd always know the relationship was likely to be a fiery one but he'd expected it to last more than a few months before those arguments started.

"Well when I went to her place earlier he was there I saw them through the window and he was kissing her, so I left then she came to my place and said if I'd waited two more minutes I'd have seen her push him away and throw him out. Then she admitted that they had a one night stand while they were at Hendon and he thought he could pick up where he left off." Gerry explained knowing it was obvious from his tone that he was trying to justify his reaction in the hope Jack might agree with him even though he knew it was unlikely.

"So she explained everything why are you here and obviously not her favourite person at the minute?" Jack asked already knowing the answer.

"I didn't exactly react well when she told me, I accused her of lying to me because there was still something between them and said she was clearly thinking of leaving UCOS and that obviously meant leaving me too and that I didn't really know her at all. Basically if there was something I could say to screw things up I said it."

"Yeah it sounds like you did and what did she say?"

"She told me she was the one who didn't know me then she stormed out and told me she didn't want to see me again until I grew up a bit and maybe not even then I need to show her I'm sorry how do I do it though when she won't even talk to me?" Gerry sighed downing the scotch in his glass as Jack shook his head.

"First of all I'd say after you said all that to her you're lucky storming out was all she did. If it had been anyone else talking to her like that they'd be in A&E right now nursing a broken jaw." Jack replied knowing that he was right, Sandra Pullman didn't take crap from anyone and he was quite sure the only reason that she hadn't seriously injured Gerry was because she loved him so much. That said though he also knew his friend was going to have to do something dramatic to make it up to her.

"Don't you think I know that Jack? I know how lucky I am to be with her at all why do you think I got so jealous in the first place? I don't want to lose her but how can I not after saying everything I did?"

"All I can tell you is if you give up and spent the rest of the night sitting here getting drunk with me you'll have an even bigger bridge to build by the morning." Jack sighed. "Look when Mary and I used to fight and she told me she never wanted to see me again I learnt pretty quickly that meant I should come back grovelling asap, now granted I never accused her of infidelity but I'm going to take a guess that the principles are the same. Go back to her place and stand on the door step ringing the bell until she lets you in which she will eventually if only to stop the neighbours from gossiping about the fact that she has a man standing on her door step refusing to go away in the middle of the night."

"And how do I make her see how sorry I am? What if Barlow's there again, I mean if she has decided she doesn't even want to see me again maybe she'll be happy to take him up on his "for old time's sake" offer." Gerry replied mentally kicking himself as Jack frowned.

"Well you don't start by saying that anyway, you can't seriously think she'd throw away your relationship for Stewart Barlow do you?" Jack asked sighing as Gerry shook his head. "Well then why would you think the fact that you'd had a row would send her into bed with him?"

"I don't think that I don't even know why I said it. God Jack no one's been able to make me so jealous and insecure as she does I'm so scared of losing her, I'm not used to this normally I'm the one…well normally…"

"Normally you're the unfaithful or potentially unfaithful one so you don't know what it's like to be worried that you might lose the woman you love to someone else. I understand how you feel but Sandra isn't you, she loves you and she's been hurt too many times in the past to do that to you or anyone else. Now I've told you what I think you should do and when you get in there just explain to her that you overreacted because you love her and you're worried about losing her and when you've said all that then pray that she accepts it as a good enough explanation."

"Ok well wish me luck." Gerry replied leaving her house and driving away in the direction of Sandra's house.

"Good luck mate." Jack said to the empty driveway as Gerry drove away, "I have a feeling you are going to need all the luck you can get this time."


	4. Chapter 4

****For Authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Misunderstood** 4/?

"Sandra let me in please. I'm not moving until you let me in and let me apologise." Gerry said loudly through the letter box as Sandra stared down the hall from the living room door. He'd been standing on the other side of her front door knocking loudly for nearly 20 minutes and refusing to accept that she wasn't going to let him in. It was getting embarrassing, it was almost midnight already and he was showing no signs of moving if he kept it up the residence committee in her quiet street were going to be getting together a petition to have her evicted!

"You've got 5 minutes before I throw you out and if after that you keep banging on my door I'll get uniform out here to arrest you for disturbing the peace." She sighed finally opening the door and standing aside to let him in. "I mean it Gerry 5 minutes so you better make it good,"

Stopping when he'd made it into the living room and turning to look at her Gerry felt his heart ache and the guilt he was already multiply as he realised she'd been crying. When they got together he'd promised himself and her that she would never shed a single tear on account of him. Now not only had he broken that promise but he'd done it in style. All he wanted was to pull her into his arms, wipe away those tears and tell her how sorry he was but the way she was standing, keeping he sofa between them and with her arms folded firmly told him it wasn't going to be that easy. Only words could solve the problem now and suddenly those words were eluding him.

"Three and a half minutes and counting Gerry." Sandra snapped when her patience with him staring at her and saying nothing ran out.

"I'm sorry…"

"So you've said so if that's all you've got you might as well go now and save yourself 3 minutes."

"I know I was an idiot, a complete tosser actually. I love you, I was jealous, I don't want to lose you the thought that someone might come along and take you away….."

"I'm not a car, or a mobile phone Gerry I can't be "stolen" I thought you trusted me. I thought you knew I loved you too and I didn't want to throw what we have away any more than you do. Is that really what you think of me? Is this the truth finally coming out? Do you think I'm so easy that all it takes is for him to turn up with some drunken memories and one unwelcome kiss and I'd throw this all away?" Sandra replied determined not to cry again, she'd been angry enough with herself for allowing herself to cry over him when she was alone she definitely didn't want to do it again in front of him.

"No of course it's not what I think of you. As soon as you left I knew I'd made a mistake but you wouldn't talk to me then I went to see Jack and….."

"You did what?" She asked as Gerry was hit by the realisation that he'd just made his second mistake of the night. It was ok to go talk to Jack but it wasn't ok for her to find out he had when she was still so angry with him. To talk to Jack meant that their friend knew what had happened between them, had been dragged into their row and she'd never be happy about that.

"I'm sorry but I needed to find out how to get you to listen to me! I thought Jack would have some idea he knows you better than any of us. As it was he basically told me I was a blind idiot who gave tossers a bad name but he did say one thing I already knew. The only way to make you see how serious I was about being sorry was to come back here and not leave until you let me explain."

Sighing as she reached for the bottle of wine on the table and a spare glass from the breakfast bar Sandra poured them both a drink before handing him his.

"Gerry this is never going to work if we don't trust each other. The problem wasn't that Stewart kissed me tonight it was the fact that you couldn't see that just because he did didn't mean I would let it go any further. You didn't trust me enough to believe I'd stop it straight away because I don't want him or anyone else but you. How can we make this work if that's what you feel like?"

"But I do trust you. I over reacted to seeing him kiss you I do know that you love me but it doesn't mean it didn't make my stomach knot and my heart break so see another man with his hands on you kissing you in a way only I want to be able to." Gerry replied setting his untouched wine on the table and finally taking a few tentative steps toward her. Right now he wanted nothing more than to comfort her, to take her in his arms and take away all the pain and doubt he's caused and make her see that they were still worth fighting for.

"Stewart Barlow means nothing to me, he didn't even mean that much to me twenty odd years ago when I slept with him to begin with. I love you and the reason I didn't tell you about what happened back then was that I knew you'd get jealous but I was wrong to keep it from you. I should have told you and explained and then maybe we wouldn't have ended up here." Sandra relented giving a little on her mental insistence that everything that had happened was his fault.

"Can't we just forget about it, forget about Barlow altogether and get on with making each other happy like we were before he arrived?" Gerry smiled almost sure he was going to get the answer he wanted until he saw her glance at the floor refusing to meet his eyes, "Sandra look at me, please tell me you're not going to throw everything we have away because of one idiotic act on my part."

"I don't want to throw anything away, I want to forget about it but you really hurt me tonight, the one thing I always thought was that you loved me enough to trust me if I don't have that belief anymore is there really any point?"

"But you still love me?"

"Of course I do." Sandra replied, letting her fingers trace the soft stubble on his cheek as he looked at her expectantly. "I'm just not sure that's enough anymore."


	5. Chapter 5

****For Authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Misunderstood** 5/?

"Sandra you don't mean that, you can't mean it not after all we've been through to get here." Gerry said quietly as she pulled away from him again and sank into the corner of the sofa. "I can't believe I'm here this. Eight years it took us to finally admit how we felt about each other. Eight years of pretending and hurting each other over and over again without even realising we were doing it. We survived that and we finally made it now you're telling me the love that got us through all that isn't enough to get us through this?"

"I don't know any more that's what I'm saying." Sandra sighed she'd known the moment she got home, closed the door and felt the tears come that what she's always feared, what had stopped her saying anything for all those years, could potentially be about to happen. Much as she loved him and had for so long she'd given up trying to work out when it started, she'd always feared that together they'd be destructive. They both had fiery tempers, they both had disastrous pasts were relationships were concerned and they had finally started their relationship with such a level of explosive desire for each other that there was always a chance that the come down when it came would be catastrophic.

"What don't you know? I mean you know how much I love you, you can't tell me that after tonight you have any doubts about that. Jesus if I didn't love you so much Sandra would I have got so jealous in the first place?" Gerry replied trying to keep the frustration out of his voice as he paced backwards and forwards in front of her trying to think of something, anything, he could say to make her see sense. "Imagine if it was the other way round. Imagine if you'd seen me kissing someone that I'd told you I'd no past with. Can you honestly tell me you'd have hung around and had a nice level headed discussion about it?"

"No of course I wouldn't I'd have been furious. I'd have been jealous and I'd probably have said things I didn't mean just like you did but don't you see that's my point!"

"What's your point? Enlighten me here Sandra because none of this is making any sense to me."

"We're my point look at us I'm starting to wonder if we're mad to think this could ever work." Sandra replied trying to form the kaleidoscope of thoughts going through her head into sentences that made some sense and would make him understand where she was coming from. "I want us to work Gerry, I love you just as much as you love me, more maybe, but can we ever get past the fact that no matter how much we trust each other we'll always be at risk of ending up like this again? One or other of us taking something innocent and turning it into something huge that will cause yet another row and more accusations followed by more apologies until the next time. Then the cycle will start all over again over something a few months later. A witness that flirts with you and makes me jealous, another guy in the station who over steps the mark with me and chances his luck and makes you jealous. I don't want to spend the next however long it would be doing that only to get to the stage where there's one too many arguments and we lose each other all together. I couldn't do that, I couldn't be someone you used to love and then couldn't stand the sight of. I'd rather put an end to it now when at least I still have you in my life in some way. Is that clear enough for you? I don't want this to end and lose you completely I couldn't cope with that now let alone a year down the lone when we've been together even longer."

"So you're saying you want to end things between is because you don't want them to end?" Gerry asked the scepticism in his voice almost making her laugh were it not for the fact he was now sitting beside her on the sofa his fingers touching hers where they rested on her lap. "I always said you were the most infuriatingly impossible woman in the world but this takes the biscuit it really does. You realise how irrational that is? Basically you're saying let's make ourselves unhappy now just in case it might happen anyway at some undetermined point in the future?"

"When you put it like that it sounds stupid I know it does." Sandra sighed finally letting him take her hand as he leaned closer and kissed her. Letting her mind give up for a second to the feeling of having his lips on hers again she didn't resist when he deepened the kiss wrapping his arms around her and pulling her closer. When he laid her back on the sofa his hands tracing her side coming to rest on her hips she knew that was the point to stop things before they were overtaken by the desire to be close again and ignored the problem completely.

"Do you really want to give up this feeling Sandra? Do you really think we can go back to how it used to be and never kiss like that again. Never make love again or wake up together or just lie on the sofa in each other's arms watching TV or talking and laugh and being together?" Gerry asked not moving from his position or relinquishing his hold on her eyes. "Do you really think this isn't worth fighting for?"


	6. Chapter 6

****For Authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Misunderstood** 6/?

"Answer me Sandra this is it, I can fight to keep you when I'm fighting against another guy but I can't fight you. If you tell me to go now that you really want to end this because of some irrational fear it will end anyway then I'll walk out the door but I won't be coming back when you wake up in the morning and realise how idiotic this all was." Gerry continued still refusing to move until she told him to herself. "I'm asking do you really want to throw this all away, time to make a decision because I can't stand the thought of losing what we have regardless of how hard it might be at times and I thought you felt the same but if you can really just say….."

"Kiss me again." Sandra said quietly desperate not to hear him say what she knew he was about to. She did want it to work as much as he did and she couldn't imagine her life without this feeling of being completely connected with him. Hearing him say he would walk away was all it had taken to snap her out of the over analytical downer she'd been on and now she needed to show him that she did feel exactly the same and she was sorry for everything. Sorry for the mess with Stewart Barlow, sorry for the fight that followed, sorry for putting them both through hell for the last hour and sorry for risking losing him because she was terrified she already had. "Please Gerry I'm sorry, you're right, this is insane and I'm sorry I've put us through it, kiss me again you're right I can't lose how right it feels no matter how hard it might be at times."

Scooping her up into his arms and bringing her to rest on his lap Gerry followed her instructions kissing her again with a passion that he hoped told her that he was sorry too. The whole evening had been a living nightmare, a whirlwind of emotions spiralling from being convinced he was losing her to someone else through a myriad of ups and down and culminating in him being back where he started believing he was losing her this time because of his own fears and insecurities. Now all he wanted was to remind her, now that she'd realised they could never go back to how it was, that they were worth any amount of anguish that might come along.

"I love you Sandra, I couldn't live without you, I tried it remember and it didn't work. Without you I'm half the person I should be and if that hurts sometimes then it's worth it for all the times when it doesn't."

"I know I love you too." Sandra whispered as his lips traced the line of her neck and she wondered for a second how she'd ever thought she could go through the rest of her life without feeling like this. Every touch of his fingers as he set about pushing her top over her head her bra joining it on the floor the fine lace being replaced by his fingers was setting her one fire. Sending searing flashes of electricity through her every nerve ending he sucked gently on her nipples the quiet groan of appreciation he gave as she arched toward him sending vibrations through her body.

"Let me take you to bed, I want to make love to you, to show you how much I need you." He said a few moments later causing a sultry giggle that she couldn't hold back. He was already succeeding in turning her into a pool of liquid desire right now she'd have let him take her anywhere provided he didn't stop. Slipping off his lap she took his hand pulling him off the sofa and into her arms.

"You can take me to the ends of the earth if you want provided when we get there you carry on doing what you just were." She smiled as they moved through the house walls and banisters their only support as they left a messy trail of clothes until they reached her bedroom door tumbling through it and onto the bed in a tangle of naked limbs and heated kisses.

"You feel so good," Gerry gasped as he captured her eyes a moment later gently thrusting into her. He loved the way she never failed to bite seductively on her bottom lip as she adjusted to him and the way it wasn't long before his name fell from those same lips in a sultry chant as he made love to her. No woman he'd ever been with could challenge him so much every day and yet give herself so completely to him when they were alone and she was an addiction he never wanted to find a cure for.

"Harder Gerry don't tease I need you deep inside me." Sandra gasped as he moved painfully slowly inside her his lips continuing their appreciation of her breasts as he did. Are the tension of the evening she needed him to take her hungrily, show her that he was a desperate to forget about everything as she was and as he kissed her again following her instructions with a precision only he could she knew he did.

Losing herself in the way it felt to feel his desire for her in a way she had thought she'd lost forever she felt her climax begin to ripple through her in moments her nails digging into his back as those ripples because a tsunami crashing through her leaving her an exhausted and sated in it's wake.

"Oh god…..oh god…..Sandra….." Gerry gasped seconds later as she clung to him feeling his body convulse in her arms as he exploded inside her falling exhausted back onto the bed and pulling her with him.

"I'm sorry." Sandra said quietly as they both came down from the high they'd been left on and she propped herself up on one elbow staring down at him. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Stewart from the beginning and I'm sorry I panicked so much when you were jealous. I love you I don't want this ever to end I was frightened."

"I know and I'm sorry for going off the deep end I can't stand the thought of anyone else kissing you, or touching you or….well anything really so I was frightened too." Gerry replied "I don't want to forget about tonight I want us to remember how bad it felt to think someone was threatening what we have and I think we'll be stronger for it."

"I know we will be." Sandra agreed resting her head on his chest as she felt sleep tug at her eyes and gave a contented sigh. As tests go this first one to their relationship had been a baptism of fire but as she finally gave up to much needed sleep she knew if they had got through it they would be fine from now on. Nothing reminds you how important something is as well as the fear of losing it and now she knew she could never let him go even if she wanted to.


End file.
